Sunday, August 11, 2013

This is not a goodbye, just a heads up.

JZSports will no longer feature content, on JZSports.

From now on, the minds that brought you JZSports will bring you JockStrapJournal.com. Literally the same thing, except a better name, a bigger team, and more content.

Just take one last fond look at JZSports, and get over to the Strap now. The journey awaits you.

And FOLLOW @sportspleaze on Twitter!

Posted on Sunday, August 11, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Thursday, June 20, 2013

Despite trailing for most of the game and with 1 minute left in the fourth quarter, LeBron and his star-studded teammates rallied to beat the Spurs in the most thrilling game of the series thus far. Now, only one game remains...

It was all Spurs for most of the contest, until the Heat rallied in the third quarter and turned the game into something magnetic. Tony Parker almost put the team on his back late in the fourth quarter and had the Spurs up 3 but Ray Allen hit an exciting clutch three-point shot that tied the game with only seconds remaining.

The can't-turn-away affair ended when Chris Bosh stuffed two shots late in overtime to preserve the victory. Game 7 is Thursday night - Miami opens as 6.5 point favorites (-300 money line/ Spurs +250) and the over/under on points is 189.5.




Posted on Thursday, June 20, 2013 by PsychoL

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Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Rookie punter Jeff Locke continues to have quite the productive offseason, showing off his versatility to videographer-kicker Blair Wash. The UCLA product was bred to grip the pigskin, if nothing else. His form is undeniable, his focus sharp...


Posted on Wednesday, June 19, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Tuesday, June 18, 2013

The Padres taught us one truth last night. You don't need a closer when you've got a Will Venable. With his game-saving catch in the bottom of the 12th inning to save the game for the Padres, Venable permanently carved his name in the dustry archives of SportsCenter submissions. With a baserunner on second, San Francisco's Juan Perez hit a rock off pitcher Nick Vincent to deep center field. Venable was there to save the day... (Image via zimbio.com)


Posted on Tuesday, June 18, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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In an attempt to revolutionize the way we receive sports updates, Russell Westbrook nearly shattered his previously torn right knee live from vine (it's Saturday night?). Oh dear...






Props to @frank_locascio for the historic find...


(Top image via sports-kings.com)



Posted on Tuesday, June 18, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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One of the world's most powerful friendships now appears to be on the rocks as Vladimir Putin has been accused of stealing Robert Kraft's Superbowl ring.

"I took out the ring and showed it to [Putin], and he put it on and he goes, 'I can kill someone with this ring,'" Kraft said at an event this week, via the New York Post. "I put my hand out and he put it in his pocket, and three KGB guys got around him and walked out."

Previously, claims Kraft, he had been prepped on a White House call and did what was best for foreign relations... (image via theatlantic.com)

"It would really be in the best interest of US-Soviet relations if you meant to give the ring as a present."

The owner of the Patriots was considered a patriot for his admirable position, but then decided to change his stance and speak the truth. Bravo? (Image via nj.com)


It seems like...


Posted on Tuesday, June 18, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Sunday, June 16, 2013

Shawn Stefani's ace on 17 brought us two things. One, the 43rd hole-in-one in U.S. Open history. Two, the most inspiring celebration we've seen on a golf course since Happy Gilmore.
(image via ksla.com)


The reaction once again...



via Shane B



Posted on Sunday, June 16, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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In an encore of Game 1, the second bout of the 2013 Stanley Cup Finals featured another nail-biting overtime finish. After a slow start, the Bruins flipped the script and controlled the majority of the game’s final 40 minutes. Daniel Paille’s overtime wrister cemented a 2-1 victory and evened the series at one game apiece, leaving us stuck on the foam-torn corner of our taped-up 1992 sofa. NHL's street cred is booming... (image via usatoday.com)

Posted on Sunday, June 16, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Saturday, June 15, 2013

Today's game against the Royals was no routine outing for Rays pitcher Alex Cobb, who was drilled in the noggin by a powerful line drive off the bat of young slugger Eric Hosmer (remember the third pick of the '08 Draft). While he did leave on a stretcher after being hit in the ear, reports say Cobb thankfully remained conscious the whole time. Our best wishes go out to Cobb for a fast and safe recovery...



Via @Matt_is_real

Image via foxsportsflorida.com



Posted on Saturday, June 15, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Tony Parker just came out and said that his hamstring "could tear at any minute." My question is WHY? All he's saying is "Please Mister LeBron James, please don't hard foul me on my precious hamstring which could snap at any minute, pwetty please." Has bountygate taught professional athletes nothing? Parker should have said, "My hamstring is made of adamantium and diamond alloy but my elbow feels like string cheese." A little misdirection and Parker would have the Heat right where he wanted them.



(Image via blacksportsonline.com)

Posted on Saturday, June 15, 2013 by PsychoL

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Just don't blame Steve Bartman...

(image via msnbcmedia.msn.com)

Posted on Saturday, June 15, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Friday, June 14, 2013

Our new hero...


Posted on Friday, June 14, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Following their 18-turnover nightmare last night, even the Spurs could smile thanks to Fox's beligerently well-timed twitter burn. The moment speaks for itself...


Posted on Friday, June 14, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Thursday, June 13, 2013

Still not on board with 19-year-old Piston man-child Andre Drummond? It's about time you hopped on the bandwagon. One special thank you goes to Chris Brown for taking the abuse...for once (too soon?).




Image via themajors.net, video via Kiley McDermott's magical "vine."

Posted on Thursday, June 13, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Once a legend, now a bench warmer, Tracy McGrady signed with the Spurs just before the playoffs after playing the regular season in China, where he averaged 25 points, 7.2 rebounds, and 5.1 assists for a last-place team and evidently stole the hearts of countless Chinese fans around the world.

McGrady has since played in six of the Spurs’ playoff games and scored a whopping 0 points. Yet somehow, the world is still head over heels for the former superstar. It's not 13 points in 35 seconds, but this cryptically breathtaking highlight reel is perhaps even more magical. (image via elitedaily.com)


Posted on Thursday, June 13, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Wow. In case you missed it, Game 1 of the 2013 Stanley Cup was one helluva ride. What began like any other soon-to-be thriller...the puck was dropped on a sheet of ice. This routine drop paved the way for undisturbed triple-overtime madness. Or, for record-book loyalists out there, the fifth longest game in Stanley Cup history (five minutes away from the longest).

Posted on Thursday, June 13, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Just like he did one year ago – also in June...also in the first inning – Orioles shortstop J.J. Hardy hit a drive deep to center field on Tuesday night. And just like one year ago, Hardy (who recently took the top spot in the All-Star voting) was spectacularly robbed. (Image via halosheaven.com)



Rewind one year...



Poor Hardy... the star shortstop making $7 million+ per year just can't catch a break. Oh wait...



Posted on Wednesday, June 12, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Unless you're a bandwagon Heat fan like Justin Bieber, these photographical masterpieces are sure to brighten your day. (courtesy of SBNation.com)

 photo lemeditation_zpse0e47a45.gif

 photo spowelp_zpsa095867a.gif

Posted on Wednesday, June 12, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Late last night, when most of you were dreaming about sheep and bunny rabbits (right?), a massively anticlimactic brawl between the Diamondbacks and Dodgers went down (although we did get this photographic gem of '80s-'90s stars Kirk Gibson, Don Mattingly, Matt Williams, and Mark McGwire doing the tango, via businessinsider.com). Like a scene from Gangs of New York, tempers flared and bats rose (see Arizona's chest-pounding bullpen march down below)...

It all came down to 22-year-old LA phenom Yasiel Puig (you know, the Dodgers sensation, newly named the "Cuban Missile," batting .471 with 4 dingers in 9 games, and propelling the Dodgers to new heights). After their prized prospect was plunked earlier in the game (see below) by Ian Kennedy, things got steamy...

 photo gQmA3RP_zps6ac29e1f.gif

Then after missing on two pitches, Zack Greinke beaned Miguel Montero in return. An eye for an eye, right? Here's when the volcano began to erupt...



And then came the epic finish...



On second thought, let's just turn to hockey for true recklessness...


Best Hockey Fight Brawl Knockout Punch Hit... by twelve2012


Posted on Wednesday, June 12, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Posted on Wednesday, June 12, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Tuesday, June 11, 2013

After being ditched by his striped posse during an unexpected crocodile attack, one helpless zebra is saved by an unlikely hero. Considering we've never seen this fearless hippo and Batman in the same room together, we were ready to assume he is in fact the superhero your town needs...until the hippo stole the zebra for itself...without hesitation...


Posted on Tuesday, June 11, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Posted on Tuesday, June 11, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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And the award for strangest commercial goes to...


Posted on Tuesday, June 11, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Jason Heyward's balls are clearly golden...homerun balls that is. After slapping a solo shot in the top of the 8th inning against the San Diego Padres last night, Heyward watched right-field diehards flock like a pack of wild piranhas also chasing a homerun ball. Let this be a cautionary tale...



And in case you missed it, here's a GIF to magnify the shenanigans.

 photo fan-into-bushes-after-heyward-homer_zps6458800b.gif

Posted on Tuesday, June 11, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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 A clownish break from the hectic world of sports, courtesy of Vitaly Zdorovetskiy...

Posted on Tuesday, June 11, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Monday, June 10, 2013

We all know that there has never been any love lost between the New England Patriots and New York Jets - these organizations like each other about as much as Jonathan Vilma likes Roger Goodell.

The never-ending feud took a new twist this week, when the Patriots announced one of the strangest and most obviously belligerent offseason moves in recent memory - the signing of New York Jets castoff Tim Tebow.

Could Bill Belichick be trolling the Jets any harder? Signing Jake Ballard off waivers after the Giants beat him in the Super Bowl was one thing - but this is a whole new level of "go screw yourself". What purpose could Belichick have for Tebow, other than to aggravate the Jets by having him on the sidelines and maybe playing a snap or two at fullback in their two games this season? This stinks of Belichick and Robert Kraft wanting nothing more than to stick it to Gang Green just for shits and giggles.

Granted, if anyone can take the hilariously untalented Tebow and make him useful, it would be the Hoodie. At least he's got a better shot at it than the 600-pound duo of Rex Ryan and Tony Sparano. Maybe Tebow will actually develop into a decent position player under the Patriot system. However, if anyone is delusional enough to think he'll get a better shot at QB reps in New England than he did in New York is sorely mistaken.

Maybe the Patriots will use him as a receiver.....



Ok, then maybe a coin toss captain...




Hey, at least he's a good sport!



End of story....this is pretty laughable. Good luck to all parties.




Posted on Monday, June 10, 2013 by Jake Silver

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In the fifth inning of his major league debut against the Cleveland Indians on Sunday, Detroit Tigers pitcher Jose Alvarez lost his nail-biting no-hit bid on a towering shot from former Tiger Ryan Raburn. Known jokester Miguel Cabrera wasn't pleased...


Posted on Monday, June 10, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Sebastiaan "Bas" Rutten is a former Dutch mixed martial artist, Karate and Taekwondo blackbelt, and kickboxer who was a UFC Heavyweight Champion and three-time King of Pancrase world champion. He even completed his bloody career on a 22-fight unbeaten streak.

Since retirement, "El Guapo" has embraced a new love for documentaries. And not just dull, sepia-soaked films called "When Sloths Attack," but instead uplifting performances combining fight with plight. Let's take a look...


Posted on Monday, June 10, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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And you thought hardwood folk couldn't be funny...


Posted on Monday, June 10, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Sunday, June 9, 2013

June 9th, 2013. Game 2 of the NBA Finals. Tiago Splitter pick-and-rolling to the hoop. 

Buried within another Heat-Spurs nail-biter was perhaps the most ferocious defense we've seen from already-ferocious fence LeBron James. As Splitter shifted toward the net with mack-truck force, James decided to cut in...and end this man's whole career.



We felt the following clip offered a fitting finish...


Posted on Sunday, June 09, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Thursday, June 6, 2013

Rather than a long-term contract, the Nuggets congratulated George Karl on winning coach of the year by giving him freedom. Karl's already a hot commodity elsewhere. This DeNiro compilation sums it up from a Denver point of view.


Posted on Thursday, June 06, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Monday, June 3, 2013

If you've never been to Florida, but have watched the Tampa Bay Rays play on television, you've probably heard an announcer or two talk about Tropicana Field like it's the old Boston Garden. You've likely hear the ballpark take a lot of the blame for the Ray's perceived low attendance. But the truth is both have been exaggerated.

First, if there is a problem with Tropicana Field, it is its location more than anything. Located in St. Petersburg, the ballpark is on the other side of Tampa Bay from the rest of Florida, which means unless you live in St. Pete, you have to take a bridge to get there. As anyone who must cross bridges in a big city during rush hour can tell you, that in a traffic nightmare. This makes getting to a weeknight game in time for a 7:05 first pitch very difficult.

The ballpark itself is fine. It pales in comparison to the new baseball palaces that have been built since this park was built in the late 1980s, but it is not the dump it is made out to be. Yes, there is an occasional lost pop fly because of the off-white roof, much like the old Metrodome in Minnesota. But there are no more lost pop ups in the Trop than there are lost pop ups in the sun at an outdoor stadium.

Yes, there is on rare occasion, a pop fly that will hit a catwalk and mess things up a bit. But we are talking one or two times per season, not every game like the TV networks would have you think.

Let me tell you something good about Tropicana Field. It is air conditioned. Outdoor baseball in new York or Boston may be great. But try sitting in an outdoor stadium in Florida for a day game in the middle of summer. You think that's fun? Tell you what. Go to a football game in Florida in late September during the day and tell me how much fun that is.

Another good thing about the Trop...it is indoors. How important is that? Well, if you live clear on the other side of the state and you take a couple of days off to take your kids to a series, you already know the games will get played. Check the schedules of some of the minor league teams that play in Florida and look at how many rain outs and double headers are on there.

Recently, I made a trip to a college baseball game in Florida. I drove for 200 miles only to see an inning and and a half before the skies opened up. If you've never been to Florida, let me describe a rain shower in for you. Picture driving through a car wash that lasts for miles. This was rain so hard that on the way back many of the cars just pulled off the interstate and parked. Do you think they are going to play baseball in that? Do you want to drive three hours to a game only to have this happen? Because in the summertime it is about a 75% chance. 

The Trop is a clean, indoor stadium with comfortable seats. The concourse level is nice and wide. The restrooms are clean. The staff is friendly. There is a tank full of stingrays the kids can go down and look at and even feed and pet. There is a museum dedicated to Ted Williams at the Trop with all sorts of cool memorabilia from his playing days and his days in the service.

At some point, the Rays will get a new ballpark. They will get one of those state of the art monstrosities with plenty of corporate perks meant to cater to big business rather than the fans. This enables the team to hopefully pay its star players more money and supposedly make the team better.

But when that day comes, many will miss the Trop. Because when the Trop goes, so to will go the days of cheap tickets, lots of elbow room, and a park you where can bring your own food. If you are planning a trip to Florida, don't be afraid to check out a Rays game at Tropicana Field. The place may not be as fancy as you are used to back in your home city, but it is not the dump it is made out to be.

Posted on Monday, June 03, 2013 by TheRaysfan

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As degenerate, peanut-and-crackerjack baseball fans, we thought we'd seen every stance in the book since Mel Ott and Mickey Tettleton graced the diamond...

Former Red Sock-current Yankee Kevin Youkilis and his finger-tip grip...













(Image via online.wsj.com)

Longtime Brewer Craig Counsell and his unnecessary stretch...



















(brewers.mlblogs.com)

Heck, even ageless phenom Julio Franco and his violent patience...



















(Image via www.policymic.com)

But not one batting-stance pioneer came close to Coastal Carolina designated hitter Alex Buccilli, who completely tarnished all expectations for what a "strange" batting stance really could be. Let's marinate in the awkward, yet revolutionary praying-mantis stance...



Posted on Monday, June 03, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Thursday, May 30, 2013

Even during the slowest football time of the year, current and former New England Patriots find a way to make us raise our eyebrows. 

It's one of those situations where it just gets progressively weirder - first the screaming Tom Brady. Then Tedi Bruschi gets denied a lip lock. When Wes Welker comes in over the top, it gets dangerously close to NSFW territory before the footage mercifully ends. 



Ostensibly, this is just bros being bros - but considering the participants, we feel obliged to ridicule them.

Posted on Thursday, May 30, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Thursday, May 9, 2013

Yes, you read that title correctly. GRIZZLY BEARS PLAYING ICE HOCKEY!
We don't know how the Russians (Chinese?) trained those bears to play, but wow. Just wow.

Our only real question is, what do you have to pay a referee to officiate grizzlies on skates?

Posted on Thursday, May 09, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Guest post by Simon.

Recently, Georges St. Pierre appeared on the Joe Rogan Experience podcast and in a heartfelt interview with comedian and main UFC commentator, Joe Rogan. The two household names discussed a number of possible changes to the UFC that might bring back some of the best elements of the “old school” days.

They also discussed aliens.

1. GSP on the UFC Round Time

“We want to see who is the best man, you know? Let them fight.”

St. Pierre makes it very clear that he does not like the length of the rounds in the UFC. He would actually prefer for there to be no clock at all. Or, at the very least rounds that are in the 15-25 minute range. This is not just an arbitrary preference on the part of GSP. He goes onto give some pretty specific reasons:

1. Rounds only exist in the (modern) UFC to appeal to the boxing crowd.
2. A more “endurance” type of approach to UFC fights is more likely to reveal the “better fighter.”
3. This would be a throwback to the “old days,” where there were no weight classes or rounds.

2. GSP on the UFC’s Octagon

“It’s fine.”

When asked about whether or not Georges was satisfied with the size and shape of the ring, some
interesting ideas popped up:

1. A cage with glass walls.
2. A squared off section of ground with no walls. (Like that of a sumo wrestling match.)

Rogan quickly pointed out that it would be impossible to see the fight through the accumulation of
sweat and blood on a glass surface. He even makes reference to the fact that some people in the
audience find the fight hard enough to see already through the black wire mesh of the cage.

When it comes to a “line drawn in the sand” type of an environment, unlike sumo wrestlers, there is a
good chance that someone could be kicked, punched, or straight-up thrown into the crowd.

They eventually agree that the Octagon is just fine.

3. GSP on Losing the Gloves in UFC Fights

“It could be an option. There would be a lot of broken hands.”

Wearing gloves allow you to basically tee off and punch your opponent as hard as you can, which
benefits the type of fighter that has a focus on striking with the hands more so than anyone else. For
instance, UFC fighters do not wear any padding on their legs, so a kick boxer has to be somewhat more strategic with his attacks.

Rogan and St. Pierre both come to agreement that getting rid of gloves would change the game from
how it currently operates—likely dramatically enough that it would make it less exciting to the amateur outsider looking in, but perhaps more exciting those individuals watching who possess a high “fighting IQ.”

4. GSP on Aliens

“If I see an alien, I put him in a choke hold.”

Georges has an interesting take on aliens. He admits that he has a certain fear when it comes to
beings from space (or another dimension.) This belief comes from the fact that he is among the small
percentage of people who report “missing time.” St. Pierre expresses a healthy skepticism towards
the paranormal, but when it comes to situations where large chunks of time seem to be “wiped” from
his memory, George certainly hasn’t discounted the existence of “the greys,” or some form of alien
intelligence abducting him to for purposes unknown—possibly to study the fighting specimen not unlike the media does.

Fortunately for Georges, Joe Rogan is somewhat of a (self-proclaimed) expert on the nature of so-called “alien encounters.” According to Rogan, there is an extremely high correlation between alien sightings and the production of the highly concentrated hallucinogen dimethyltryptamine, more commonly referred to as DMT.

It could be the case that the extreme training required to maintain a UFC title is plunging Georges into such a powerful dreamscape his brain is overproducing DMT, and effectively playing tricks on him— or maybe it really is aliens. Whatever the case, according to the mixed martial arts fighter, this strange phenomenon has been happening to him since he was a kid.

About the Author:

Simon is a writer and content specialist who is addicted to being on the front page of anything. A
graduate of Dalhousie University, he transitioned from music and entertainment into the persuasive
world of online marketing. Simon specializes in how-to, editorials, and using the em dash too often.
Currently, he rests his typing hands in Vancouver, Canada.

Posted on Tuesday, May 07, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Sunday, April 28, 2013

Olympic swimmer Ryan Lochte may be somewhat of a polarizing figure - his inability to deliver a coherent interview is the stuff of legends - but now he has taken his powers of absurdity to new heights.

His patented "Jeah" has just managed to ruin one of the more popular songs of the early 2000's. Take a look. 

Posted on Sunday, April 28, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Friday, April 26, 2013


God damn this man is sexy

 photo tumblr_lyjvziMyog1r2owmbo1_400_zps9e7d1499.gif


Posted on Friday, April 26, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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What happens when you put a pair of 7-foot centers on a roller coaster? They scream like petulant children.


















(Image via sportzbroz.com)

Posted on Friday, April 26, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Monday, April 22, 2013

Guest post by Hannah R

Finding legal and safe mood enhancing products can be difficult. There are thousands of products on the market that claim to produce amazing results. Whether they are relaxants or stimulants, there are some amazing, natural and legal products available for anyone to purchase. The top Internet retailer for these types of mood enhancing products is Herbal City LLC. From the makers of the real and original Herbal Potpourri, Herbal City has many different brand name smoking products, mood enhancers and Party Powders for customers to choose from. 

Herbal potpourri is a type of herb that is legal and created for smoking. People who use these products experience pleasant effects that are one hundred percent legal and regulated. There are many types of herbal smoking products available online through Herbal City. Some of the extremely potent and very popular brand names of herbal potpourri are Walk The Line, Emotional Rescue, Caution, Madhatter, Joker, Funky Monkey, Hysteria and dozens more. Each blend of herbal potpourri has very unique aspects that individualize them from the other products. Interested individuals can easily read about the various herbal products on the Herbal City website, which provides potency information, blend information, plant history and more. 

In addition to herbal potpourri, Herbal City offers products like Party Powders and Mood Enhancing Pills. These legal products increase energy and allow the user to experience a pleasant, altering experience unlike any other. Some of the products that Herbal City offers in this category include X-T-C, HALO, Synergy and more.

The Herbal City website provides detailed information about each product and the various natural benefits that each product provides. Users can enjoy a legal and pleasant experience by using various Herbal City products.

Posted on Monday, April 22, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Sunday, April 21, 2013

Though the J in JZSports is an unabashed raging Giants fan, Zack is simply too overcome with joy to even type, so here we are. Despite my allegiance and persistent stream of abuse towards them, I am a New Yorker and have nothing against the Jets. I happen to like them.

Some of you Jets fans out there are probably tearing your hair out over the loss of Darelle Revis - please don't. Your team is much better off because of it. The Jets get the #13th overall pick in next week's draft, in ADDITION to a fourth-round pick in 2014 that has almost a 100% chance of becoming a  third-rounder instead. All Revis has to do is be on the Bucs by the second week of March in 2014...and considering they just gave up the aforementioned first-rounder, that seems like a no brainer. As if that wasn't enough, the Bucs just saddled themselves with a massive contract to Revis, which the cap-loving John Idzik correctly wanted no part of.

Darelle Revis is a malcontent, a bad apple in your locker room. He's the type of guy who inadvertently causes impressionable young prospects to think that they are bigger than the team. Revis never learned that the player works for the organization - not vice versa. You know you're in for a headache when a guy is holding out as a rookie; but when he does that two more times in four years? That's not a person who is likely to change his ways. Revis has always been about the money, and in the NFL your impact players need to be about the wins.

Look at the contract he just got from the Buccaneers - six years, $96 million. Oh hi, isn't $96 mil what the Denver Broncos are giving to PEYTON MANNING?? Sorry, don't care how good Revis thinks he is, how good Rex Ryan thinks he is, or how good Tampa thinks he is - you give that money to a guy who can take you to the Super Bowl single-handed. That person will never be a cornerback. Granted, his new contract has no guaranteed money, but we all know he'll see at least two years of it thanks to that 1st round pick. Regardless of the delusions of both he and his agent, Revis has never been worth $16 million per year. Even if that were possible for a corner, he never will be either after his 2012 ACL injury.

The Jets can now overhaul their draft strategy next week. They can use the #9 pick on an impact pass-rushing prospect, like Barkevious Mingo or Jarvis Jones, or even grab NT Star Lotulelei if he drops down to #9. It can always happen if teams in the top 8 get QB-happy. After that, they can use the #13 pick to draft a solid offensive line prospect, or *GASP* a SECOND impact pass-rusher. if a couple of guys fall, they can snag two top quarterback-killing prospects within four picks of each other. Or they can choose to trade up for a prospect like Dion Jordan, or maybe trade down for additional picks.

The point is, the Jets have flexibility with the cap, the draft, two top-15 picks next week, and they rid themselves of a selfish diva who would accept nothing less than total overpayment. If you doubted John Idzik  at the time of his hiring, then rejoice Jets fans - there is a genius in your front office at last.

Posted on Sunday, April 21, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Thursday, April 11, 2013

This has been called a hardwood thunder clap by experts.

 photo ClKc8N1_zps6ae91d7a.gif

Posted on Thursday, April 11, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Carved from the depths of a once-frustrated Knickerbocker fanbase, we at JZ Sports needed more than just several timely articles scrutinizing Jamarcus Russell's NFL career to get noticed. We needed search engine optimization, quality visuals, and quirky content worthy of a share. Any energetically misguided blogger can relate.

However, the difficulties in expanding a website pale in comparison to the challenge of even getting noticed as a small service business website. Here's where SEO Samba has made their mark...

Continuously introducing unique franchise marketing systems to ecstatic customers in Europe and the United States, SEO Samba has transformed countless young businesses and maximized promising websites.

What does this entail? How is it done?!

Well, during the creation of JZ Sports we got our first taste of blogging responsibility. We naturally found out that website design was essential. SEO Samba can offer revolutionary web design tactics. Aesthetics are only half the battle, as first-time viewers can't help but demand more. An engaging user experience and search engine ranking optimization, otherwise known as SEO website design, is necessary to attracting unique visitors.

Of course, if you're more of a proven online savant, perhaps SEO Samba's internet marketing software is your calling. The options are limitless, but time is precious.

In the age of online design and Pay Per Click marketing tactics, one must implement something unique and fresh to get noticed. Yet even for those with something truly magical to share, search engine optimization conquers all. As the old adage goes, does a tree really burp if no one is listening? Wait...

Posted on Thursday, April 11, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Our least-favorite purple-drankin' draft bust of all time has reared his overstuffed head once again.

With a poorly-hyped comeback in the making, we can check in on this writhing, sweating mass of illiteracy and broken promises hard at work.



Remember, this is the same guy who not too long ago was mired in legal trouble and doing things like this.

The fact that he appears to have lost any weight at all is somewhat shocking. The questions that now remain - will he find a new NFL job? If he does, how long before he beats out the Mark Sanchez Buttfumble for "Not Top Ten" supremacy?

Posted on Tuesday, April 09, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Umping has hit rock bottom.


Posted on Tuesday, April 09, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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The average fan might assume that JZSports pulls in a vast audience with our bevy of belligerent content and quirky grammar skills, but they would naturally be wrong.

SEO consulting services helped take the fledgling J and Z from an amateur-hour blog, to a shining beacon of dynamic sports content and clever SEO. Yes, our roommate might be a lanky degenerate who likes to style himself as an SEO Expert, but after discovering the SEO consulting services of Danny DeMichele's SEOConsultant.net, we know the road to success is paved by professionals who have been in the SEO consulting game for 15 years. It was an opportunity we couldn't refuse.

Running a successful business or a website in this day and age is no longer just about posting epic photographs or providing unique services. If your web page is not ranking highly on Google or the other search engines like Bing and Yahoo, no one is ever going to know about your company - and we think that would be a real shame. If your business does not have a web presence of any kind and you think you don't need SEO consulting services, that is really another problem entirely - and we just feel bad for you.

Consulting SEO experts can completely change the game for you and your business. It certainly did that for us, as engine optimization and essential key words propel our genuine sports content to the top of the online food chain! Don't waste your time by not improving your SEO - talk to SEOconsultant.net TODAY, and watch your search traffic improve forever starting tomorrow.

Posted on Tuesday, April 09, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Sunday, April 7, 2013

Never has a shot been this frustrating...


Posted on Sunday, April 07, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Perfect.


Posted on Sunday, April 07, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Saturday, April 6, 2013

Just sit back and enjoy this arbitrary photo of John Wall and his dogs on this sunny Saturday afternoon.

We just wish he had Hot Cheetos and Takis in his shooting hand instead.


Posted on Saturday, April 06, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Thursday, April 4, 2013

It's no secret that Dwight Howard shoots free throws less effectively than a bag of vegetable soup with a torn rotator cuff. This season, however, the faltering super-man is 314-for-646 from the line (49%), missing 332 free throws…as many as teammate Steve Nash has missed during his entire 17-year career. Allow that to sink in.

Here's Mike Woodson staring down J.R. Smith to better highlight our shock and awe...

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And here's a taste of Dwight's prowess...



(Thanks to USAToday.com for this disturbing fact)

Posted on Thursday, April 04, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Poor Brandon Knight. At some point, we gotta stop feeling scorn and instead just feel bad for the poor guy.



How does a former No. 5 overall pick manage to bomb a fast break layup this badly? Isn't that the kind of thing they bench you for in high school? Maybe even at basketball camp?

Regardless of just how much he sucks, we can't abuse Brandon Knight too badly, he's still not fully recovered from the resurrection after his untimely death at the hands of Deandre Jordan..

Posted on Thursday, April 04, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Bob Costas has never been more iconic.


Posted on Wednesday, April 03, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Did you ever think you could win $200,000 playing fantasy baseball? We sure didn't, but that's exactly what you can do by playing in FanDuel.com's DFBC!

45 skilled qualifiers will win seats to the biggest and best fantasy baseball tournament of all time. Where do these seats take you? To none other than Las Vegas, where you will enjoy an all-expenses paid luxury weekend courtesy of FanDuel, while you compete in the DFBC final on Saturday, August 3rd.

The winner of the final on that day (Taking place at the premier Sportsbook experience in Vegas, Lagasse's Stadium), will walk away with a life-changing $200,000! This is the biggest fantasy baseball prize in history - don't miss out!

FanDuel has a $25 qualifier running tonight....enter it HERE





Posted on Tuesday, April 02, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Monday, April 1, 2013

20-year-old bro-turned-phenom Bryce Harper clown-questioned the entire Major Leagues today, with one of the studliest swings we've seen since the Griffey days of 864 BC. Here is the future of baseball...



And a second shot...


(Image via washingtonpost.com)

Posted on Monday, April 01, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Yesterday was a bittersweet victory for the University of Louisville as they defeated Duke to advance tot the Final Four, thanks to a calamitous and horrifying leg injury to Kevin Ware, making Joe Theismann's injury look like a walk in the park.

Ware went up to block a 3 point shot by Duke near the end of the first half, landing brutally on his leg, which buckled under him immediately.

With the bone protruding out of his leg, several of Ware's teammates dropped to the court in tears, while some of those on the bench actually vomited right there on the floor.

While being carried off the court, Ware was actually screaming "WIN THE GAME" to his teammates. You gotta admire the moxy on this guy - a real team player. We at J.Z Sports wish him a speedy and effective recovery.

Be warned, the video below is graphic and disturbing.

Posted on Monday, April 01, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Saturday, March 30, 2013

Statistically one of the greatest athletes in Philadelphia history, former Chunky Soup salesman Donovan McNabb will forever be bashed for his inability to win the big game. However, it seems Mc-Flab and the City of Brotherly Love can FINALLY agree on something...Tony Romo's contract.

Thanks to Jerry Jones' viciously misguided approach to running a professional football team, we may never see the Cowboys win a playoff game again (assuming Mr. Jerry Wipe himself is indeed around forever, which seems a real possibility every time we catch a glimpse of his embalmed, corpse-like smile). Keep this in mind; the Cowboys just gave a guy with one whole playoff win the second most guaranteed cash in NFL history (Tom Brady, $57 million; Tony Romo, $55 million; Drew Brees, $55 million: Joe Flacco, $51 million, per NFL guru Adam Shefter).

In the end, all credit goes to McNabb for epitomizing literally every single reaction to Romo's only true victory...cashing in on a heinous six-year, $108 million extension...Though McKayla Maroney is still less impressed.


Posted on Saturday, March 30, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Friday, March 29, 2013



Though the Knicks (and us) may be enjoying a league-high six game winning streak, their ancient and storied roster can still provide endless amusement, if you have the right conversation.

I decided to talk some Knicks basketball with my cousin recently, despite knowing full well that he hasn't followed the NBA since the early 2000's. The ensuing conversation was nothing short of hilarious. (Note this was shortly after the win against the Jazz to start the streak).


"I know you don't really follow anymore, but the Knicks have been killing it the past couple games, let's watch a few quarters."

"That's pretty sweet, I'm down. Who's on the Knicks this year anyway?"

"Besides Melo? Kurt Thomas had a pretty big game for us last week..."

"Wait, Kurt Thomas?! Isn't he, like, 50 now? He was on the team in the 99' finals wasn't he?"

"Yup, that's the guy, oldest player in the NBA. He's been on like six other teams."

"Holy shit. I didn't realize you could play that long. Who else do they have?"

"Well, theres Marcus Camby..."

"Camby?? He's still on the team? I used to play as him in NBA2k2!"

"Oh no, this is his first year back with us. He's played for a bunch of teams since then."

"What is he now, like 37??"

"38, and he's not even the second oldest guy on the team...Jason Kidd is 39, and...."

"Wait - the guy from the Nets? What the fuck??!"

"He hasn't been a Net for a while. He won a title with the Mavs a few years ago. We've also got Kenyon Martin!"

"Ok is this the oldest team in the league or some shit?"

"Dead right! You'll never guess the last old guy either."

".........."

"Rasheed Wallace"

"Okay, now you're fucking with me!"

"I swear! We also have the Argentinian national point guard. He's 35. And a 28 year old rookie."

".....fuck off."


Want to check out some cool music? Take a listen to The Strange Times. The bassist's musical ability is vastly superior to his NBA knowledge.

Posted on Friday, March 29, 2013 by Jake Silver

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With news of former ace Johan Santana re-tearing the anterior capsule in his left shoulder flooding paper stands around the salty Metropolitan streets, Mets fans/brass/teammates are once again crying for answers. WHY US!?

Amazin' captain David Wright called it "shocking and disheartening;" The cashier at the corner deli called "Ay, Jesus Christos!" Even the sweatered pitbull that sits outside of Citi Field with a lit cigar called it "ruff."

The Mets may have an influx of promising youngsters climbing the ranks, yet there is a melancholy feel about the recent past that has left a bad taste in fans' mouths. We still owe Bobby Bonilla about 25 annual payments of $1.9 million (through 2035), and he's been retired for 12 years. We just paid Jason Bay $21 million NOT to play for us this season. We essentially paid $137 million for a no-hitter and nothing else. Oh, and how could we forget...our mascot looks like a testicle!!

Bet most of you wish you took the red pill, huh?

(Image via nationalpostsports.tumblr.com)

Posted on Friday, March 29, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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CBS Sports' Doug Gottlieb had the Twitter world erupting like Mount Vesuvius back in A.D. 79, only several hours ago. 140-character blankets of ash continues to settle since the dorky analyst made things slightly awkward, providing his "white-man's perspective."



But then came Big Mound Barkley to the rescue...


Posted on Friday, March 29, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Sunday, March 24, 2013

In the final round of the 2013 Arnold Palmer Invitational, Sergio Garcia hits his second shot from a tree near the fairway on the par-4 10th hole...with one hand and backwards. He nails it.


Posted on Sunday, March 24, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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It took 15 years, but 16-year-old Justin Stank is officially the most adored Colorado State fan in Colorado State history.





First he was seen struggling to stay awake during Colorado State's convincing victory over Missouri... (Oh I'm sorry, are we keeping you up?)

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He was spotted remaking the YMCA...

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And showing his true colors while his team was getting trampled by Louisville...

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Just kidding Stank! You're our hero. (top image via NYTimes)

Posted on Sunday, March 24, 2013 by Zack Pumerantz

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Saturday, March 23, 2013


While Washington Redskins fans marinate in their adoration of the impeccable Robert Griffin the Third, they have actually overlooked the fact that their beloved RG3 is nothing but RG3 II.



Rex Grossman, the much maligned former starter turned backup turned starter turned bench warmer, actually is legally named Rex Grossman III. As a former starter for coach Mike Shanahan's Redskins, Grossman is truly the original RG3.

While we won't go the Rob "I'm a Brain Damaged Racist" Parker route and question Robert Griffin personally - maybe he should run a quick check around before he tries to trademark the RG3 moniker.

Don't worry Robert - while I may hate your team, you're alright. You're just a copycat. But fuck Rob Parker.

Posted on Saturday, March 23, 2013 by Jake Silver

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Friday, March 22, 2013

We don't know....you tell us.
Does this 6'8'' Knicks forward shave his beard in the morning and dominate for Baylor, before going to marinate on the Knicks bench by night? Perhaps the other way around?


Astounding physical similarities. Apparently though, on-court dominance doesn't seem to translate. 


Posted on Friday, March 22, 2013 by Jake Silver

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